I picked up my four year-old daughter from preschool. After buckling her into the car, she turns to me with those intense, dark eyes and smiles broadly. I melt as I always do. I'm so in love with this kid. No matter what chaos is going on in my life, she centers me. She hugs my neck and I can smell the scent of the playground in her hair mixed with a little sweat. Spring in South Florida heats up fast. I get into the front seat of the car and start the drive home.
"Mommy?" I hear her dainty voice making sure I have her attention.
"Yes, Doodle?" I peered into the rear-view mirror to look at her innocent face.
"I'm gonna marry Jenna," she announced with an air of certainty.
"You mean Jonathan or Tannor?" I tried to clarify.
"NO. Jen-Na," she enunciated, like I was a little slow on the uptake.
"I see. You're not going to marry a boy?"
"No. They are scary and they always want to act like a monster or a animal," she explained.
Yea, that doesn't change much, kid, but they do grow on you. "You might change your mind when you get older," I suggested. "So there are going to be two mommies in your family?" I'm in for a penny, I guess.
"That would be silly," she giggles.
"Mommy, maybe when I'm five I'll marry a boy after Jenna." We pull up into the parking space and my honey comes to help us get some things out of the car. "That's who I'll marry, mommy," she says pointing at my boyfriend.
Okay, my little budding bisexual, darling divorcee with an Electra complex. Clearly, I'm going to have my hands full in the next few years.
Saturday, April 30, 2011
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
When It Floods, It Rains
Last week I got a call from a client. "My house is flooded and I need to reschedule my appointment. Is there anything available tomorrow?", she desperately inquires. I explain there was indeed one cancellation the next day, but with only enough time to complete one component of her services. She happily takes it.
The next day she comes in and as soon as her appointment is done, she asks if there were time for one more service. Fortunately for her, someone did indeed cancel and we were able to accommodate her additional service. Again, she finishes her appointment and asks if by chance there were time to add just one more service. Again, she was saved by another cancellation. After such a horrible day just the day before, things seemed to be going her way. This really struck me.
I looked at her in all seriousness and pointed my finger almost forcefully. "You are really in the flow today. You should buy a lottery ticket or something. Something big could come your way." I was stunned by the way the words just flew out of my mouth. Later that night, during a guided mediation on abundance, that client drifted into my mind. Fast forward to this week. Same client comes back. She calls me over.
I suddenly get a big kiss as the client asks me to reach in her purse and grab her wallet. She then whips out a hundred dollar bill and hands it to me.
"I can't take this", I say shaking my head.
"You have to, it's good karma", she pleads.
"Okay, why?", I inquire.
"I took your advice", she grins.
"Did you win something?"
"You spoke to me with such certainty that I felt I had to follow your advice."
"Well, I can't take credit. You followed the advice...", I trailed off.
She interrupted me with the words: "Twenty-three thousand dollars on the two-cent slots."
"Woo-hoo!", I exclaimed. My excitement was so electric that any outsider would have thought I had won the twenty-three thousand dollars. I then remembered the moment in the guided mediation when she popped in my head. It was during the part where they were talking about being excited with another's fortune is a sign of being "in the vortex" (or flow).
I was just happy to play a role in her synchronicity.
The next day she comes in and as soon as her appointment is done, she asks if there were time for one more service. Fortunately for her, someone did indeed cancel and we were able to accommodate her additional service. Again, she finishes her appointment and asks if by chance there were time to add just one more service. Again, she was saved by another cancellation. After such a horrible day just the day before, things seemed to be going her way. This really struck me.
I looked at her in all seriousness and pointed my finger almost forcefully. "You are really in the flow today. You should buy a lottery ticket or something. Something big could come your way." I was stunned by the way the words just flew out of my mouth. Later that night, during a guided mediation on abundance, that client drifted into my mind. Fast forward to this week. Same client comes back. She calls me over.
I suddenly get a big kiss as the client asks me to reach in her purse and grab her wallet. She then whips out a hundred dollar bill and hands it to me.
"I can't take this", I say shaking my head.
"You have to, it's good karma", she pleads.
"Okay, why?", I inquire.
"I took your advice", she grins.
"Did you win something?"
"You spoke to me with such certainty that I felt I had to follow your advice."
"Well, I can't take credit. You followed the advice...", I trailed off.
She interrupted me with the words: "Twenty-three thousand dollars on the two-cent slots."
"Woo-hoo!", I exclaimed. My excitement was so electric that any outsider would have thought I had won the twenty-three thousand dollars. I then remembered the moment in the guided mediation when she popped in my head. It was during the part where they were talking about being excited with another's fortune is a sign of being "in the vortex" (or flow).
I was just happy to play a role in her synchronicity.
Sunday, March 13, 2011
The Invisible Man
Bret Favre. Jesse James. Ashton Kutcher. Tiger Woods. Just the most recent casualties of high-tech cheating. These men thought they could become invisible in the nether regions of cyberspace.
I've been thinking about "The Invisible Man" lately. Not so much the H.G. Wells story, but the later movies. Especially the version called "The Hollow Man" made in 2000. I remember watching one of those "behind the scenes" pieces and being particularly intrigued about a discussion of how morality declines if the actions of a person cannot be seen. Pretty sad. Basically, we all need to be our brother's keeper or society will go to Hell in a hand-basket. I couldn't believe that. It's just too grim. I refuse to believe that people are not basically good.
Ten years later, I'm revisiting that idea and rethinking my position. Since that movie came out, we've seen the internet explode and have introduced texting and Facebook into our everyday life. We are more connected, yet disconnected. More visible, yet invisible. I'm not saying we're in Hell, but Al Gore did get a Nobel Prize for telling us that it's getting a wee bit warmer. The simple fact is that people tend to say and do things behind computers and cell phones that they normally wouldn't do otherwise. This is the much touted, cliché-riddled, "double-edged sword". A lot of good and healing comes from being able to discuss matters freely and openly. A lot of hurt, divorce, and cyber-bullying occur as well.
I'm doing my fair share of healing from internet burn. It's been a while since my last post. Perhaps feeling like the invisible man can have a positive result if I'm free to express and heal openly, yet secretly. I've released a lot of venom privately over these last few months. Venom that has no place in the universe or out in cyberspace. I felt it was the responsible thing to do. It's my way of healing without doing harm to others. We are hit daily with toxic images and stories. I felt it was irresponsible to add to the mix. However, now that I'm less toxic, I'm ready to be more visible in my invisibility.
I've been thinking about "The Invisible Man" lately. Not so much the H.G. Wells story, but the later movies. Especially the version called "The Hollow Man" made in 2000. I remember watching one of those "behind the scenes" pieces and being particularly intrigued about a discussion of how morality declines if the actions of a person cannot be seen. Pretty sad. Basically, we all need to be our brother's keeper or society will go to Hell in a hand-basket. I couldn't believe that. It's just too grim. I refuse to believe that people are not basically good.
Ten years later, I'm revisiting that idea and rethinking my position. Since that movie came out, we've seen the internet explode and have introduced texting and Facebook into our everyday life. We are more connected, yet disconnected. More visible, yet invisible. I'm not saying we're in Hell, but Al Gore did get a Nobel Prize for telling us that it's getting a wee bit warmer. The simple fact is that people tend to say and do things behind computers and cell phones that they normally wouldn't do otherwise. This is the much touted, cliché-riddled, "double-edged sword". A lot of good and healing comes from being able to discuss matters freely and openly. A lot of hurt, divorce, and cyber-bullying occur as well.
I'm doing my fair share of healing from internet burn. It's been a while since my last post. Perhaps feeling like the invisible man can have a positive result if I'm free to express and heal openly, yet secretly. I've released a lot of venom privately over these last few months. Venom that has no place in the universe or out in cyberspace. I felt it was the responsible thing to do. It's my way of healing without doing harm to others. We are hit daily with toxic images and stories. I felt it was irresponsible to add to the mix. However, now that I'm less toxic, I'm ready to be more visible in my invisibility.
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